I'm Trying to Write a Book, but this Sh*t is Hard.

My dream, for the longest time, has been to become a published, established, and recognized author. I love writing, I love telling stories, and I love transporting people into my imagination. On the other hand, my other love is horror.

The horror genre has been my firm favourite for years. The intensity, the visuals, the wording, everything about horror appeals to me, and a couple of years ago I decided I wanted to merge my love for writing and horror into a book of short stories.

I've read the Necronomicon, a collection of horror stories by the infamous H.P Lovecraft. His writing style and use of imagery drags you into the story before you even know what is happening, and he quickly takes over your mind and makes you feel, think, and see everything his characters are.

Now, you would think having the passion, drive, and inspiration would be the trifecta that allows one to start and write their own book, create their own worlds, but alas, this is not the case.

I completely understand that the art of writing, and in particular the art of creating a book, is trial and error at an extreme level, and completely lends itself the old saying of "If it was easy, everyone would do it", but damn, I didn't expect it to be this hard.

To some, this won't come as a surprise, obviously this is common knowledge, but I don't think people realise how much writing a book tests your mind, imagination, and general ability to string words together.

For seasoned authors, this is once again no surpise, but this is more for the younger generation, or people who are starting or working on their first novel, we can all agree that this is the one of the biggest challenges we have faced as writers.

This isn't a rant, this is me coming to terms with the fact that something I want is going to require more work and time than I could have imagined, but so far, I can honestly say it has been the most rewarding experience.

Letting my friends and family read drafts of my stories, reacting to the imagery I create and being freaked out or disgusted (I'm writing horror, this is a great thing) is an incredible sight. It's the reaction I want, the feelings I want, and even though I am far from finished, it's the motivation I need.

This comes to, what I think, is the most difficult part for writers, thinking what they have spent time and energy on is worthless. Thinking that the world you have put so much time into creating is a throw away that nobody understands or even wants to read.

I am here to tell you that the only way to find out, is to write it, and let people read it. Even if you only get one positive reaction, it will light a fire to continue writing, to create, to excite, or to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve with your writing.

I'm not sure if this post will mean anything to anyone, but I wanted to write it as almost a catharsis. But, if this helps someone realise they are still going in the right direction, even if they think they are "failing", then great, because it has helped me, and I hope it helps you.